Friday, November 02, 2007

what if i fall further than you? (reprise)

Dear heart,

i just finished watching when berger broke up with carrie via post-it. the last entry inspired me to watch it and i guess its human nature to find connections with EVERYthing but i feel like that's how it is. he's this fantastic, hilarious guy who has some issues... which spills over and eventually leaves the already nutso girl in more confusion than she began with.

the ingrid michaelson song called giving up is what brought upon my title. it's basically a song mentioning all the things that might go wrong, but the person is gonna give up worrying and thinking something else might be better because amidst it all, she's happy where she is.

i don't know the point of it all. i just wish he'd just tell me something... ANYthing. even "you make me sick. you're an ugly biatch and i can't stand you." i'd take that. i dyed my hair black on whim because of all this. i'm not regretting it yet but people's reactions are advising me otherwise. i need this color right now too. not only cuz its winter and people always look a bit silly with summer hair for this season... but because black hair makes me strong. like i'm not gonna take anyone's crap. and i really won't. so forget berger/james. i'm not gonna wait around for him. right?

this heart of mine was broken at 12:28:00 AM
0 people tried to mend this shattered heart

Cast List

Checklist


    x keeps his promises
    x no smoking
    x no drinking
    x drinks with me
    x can drive
    x 21 and over
    x has a job
    x attractive or endearingly cute
    x makes me laugh
    x i can make him laugh
    x has a car
    x tough on the outside, a softy when it comes to me
    x no hardcore drugs
    x gets along with my friends
    x can get jealous
    x trusts me to let me go out with guy friends
    x honest, even when it hurts
    x can go shopping with me and tells me what he likes on me
    x kisses nice
    x does little sweet things
    x calls all the time
    x has a cell phone
    x smells good- either cologne sexy or has a natural comforting smell which i judge for myself
    x parents love me
    x friends love me
    x likes seafood and asian food
    x cooks for me
    x let's me be in control
    x is in control
    x not abusive
    x i can joke with
    x pokes fun at me and vice versa
    x loves my weirdness
    x wears beach clothing or GQ clothes or skater clothes
    x respect privacy
    x my best friend
    x smart
    x goes to school
    x my parents like him
    x doesn't have a significant ex who can come back
    x no girlfriend
    x can act mature but also playful with me
    x i can play-fight with like wrestling
    x likes falling asleep on the phone
    x likes my music
    x shy but opens up to me
    x will never cheat
    x won't drive me to cheat
    x flirts with me
    x can say im beautiful even when i dont have make-up on
    x let's me dress him or style his hair
    x goes to church with me
    x loves to kiss me, hold me, touch me
    x publicly displays his affection
    x sings even when he can't
    x chooses me over his friends
    x would do anything for me
    x likes coffee
    x wears shorts sometimes
    x not a workaholic
    x puts himself in my place when we fight
    x isn't all talk but no action
    x holds me when we sleep
    x can fart in front of me
    x can fart in front of him
    x joins me when im weird
    x listens to my problems, even when they are about him


    [[ RECOMMENDED ]]
    x wears glasses
    x watches chick flicks or willing to watch foreign films
    x lives within a 20 minute radius of my house
    x takes me shopping
    x likes to read
    x good in bed
    x goes to my school
    x new in bed
    x loves coffee the way i make it
    x boxers!
    x sings in the shower
    x picks flowers for me
    x british, australian, french accents
    x watches smallville or dawsons creek
    x financially secure (RICH)
    x has no girl pals but me
    x rarely hangs with the boys and takes me when he does
    x a fireman
    x drives a truck
    x wears flip flops
    x half white? hehe

Those Days




since april.01.2002