Wednesday, December 20, 2006
ARGH!!!!
Dear heart,
ok so he was supposed to coe at 10:00 and sneak in. he calls and i'm all excited to pick up the phone. he sounded weird and he says my name in a way where he's trying to prepare me for something. then: "don't be mad, ok?" he didn't want to come because he didn't want to sneak into my room. he's all paranoid that my dad already knows him and he doesn't want to get caught here. he promises a sincere promise that we'll hang out tomorrow and he gets off early so he'll pick me up then. i'm so busy being mad and trying to convince him to come over that i overlook the sincere sorryness in his voice. before he even got to say bye, i say bye and hang up.
i was so angry. i am on my rag so my frustration was being magnified to a hundred. i started pouting and throwing my phone across the room screaming i hated him. i was seriously in tears from being so upset. i texted him that i took a shower for him because i thought he was coming over. i told him he didn't have to sneak out- just in. then he texts me back: yes i know! you know that i hate sneaking into your house! i don't want to get caught cuz your dad knows who i am now! i told you tomorrow for sure! good night i'm going to bed! again i throw my phone across the room.
after a few minutes i calm down for a bit. am i crazy? anthony is NOT a normal guy. acting that way is going to get me the boot! he's come so far in this half relationship and i'm just pushing him back to where we started. i don't want to be those other girls. if i ruined it- i don't know what i'm going to do.
so of course i call him after i get my head on straight. he sounds like he was sleeping and i told him i was sorry. he said it was ok. i couldn't read his tone thru the sleepiness. my stomache is in knotts.
and then my escape was vince. so he wanted to come over. then i was feeling a bit lazy cuz it hurts to put clothes on. he gets all huffy like he felt like i didn't want to see him. OMG! boys are so f*cking stupid!!!! i hate them all! i'm so over all that! this is the problem with too many guys! they all decide to piss you off at the same time and you're screwed. people should know better than to act like this to me when i'm on my rag!
ok so he was supposed to coe at 10:00 and sneak in. he calls and i'm all excited to pick up the phone. he sounded weird and he says my name in a way where he's trying to prepare me for something. then: "don't be mad, ok?" he didn't want to come because he didn't want to sneak into my room. he's all paranoid that my dad already knows him and he doesn't want to get caught here. he promises a sincere promise that we'll hang out tomorrow and he gets off early so he'll pick me up then. i'm so busy being mad and trying to convince him to come over that i overlook the sincere sorryness in his voice. before he even got to say bye, i say bye and hang up.
i was so angry. i am on my rag so my frustration was being magnified to a hundred. i started pouting and throwing my phone across the room screaming i hated him. i was seriously in tears from being so upset. i texted him that i took a shower for him because i thought he was coming over. i told him he didn't have to sneak out- just in. then he texts me back: yes i know! you know that i hate sneaking into your house! i don't want to get caught cuz your dad knows who i am now! i told you tomorrow for sure! good night i'm going to bed! again i throw my phone across the room.
after a few minutes i calm down for a bit. am i crazy? anthony is NOT a normal guy. acting that way is going to get me the boot! he's come so far in this half relationship and i'm just pushing him back to where we started. i don't want to be those other girls. if i ruined it- i don't know what i'm going to do.
so of course i call him after i get my head on straight. he sounds like he was sleeping and i told him i was sorry. he said it was ok. i couldn't read his tone thru the sleepiness. my stomache is in knotts.
and then my escape was vince. so he wanted to come over. then i was feeling a bit lazy cuz it hurts to put clothes on. he gets all huffy like he felt like i didn't want to see him. OMG! boys are so f*cking stupid!!!! i hate them all! i'm so over all that! this is the problem with too many guys! they all decide to piss you off at the same time and you're screwed. people should know better than to act like this to me when i'm on my rag!
this heart of mine was broken at 10:49:00 PM
0 people tried to mend this shattered heart
0 people tried to mend this shattered heart